A long time ago there was a group of people who set out on a journey. They were chasing their dreams, the dreams that had been dreamed by their great grandparents. It finally seemed like everything came together. Everything just seemed right. Here they were doing the thing that they had only ever imagined, and never knew how it could be a reality. Joy flooded every atom of their beings. The best part was that it was God himself who had set them up for this dream to come true. They hadn't done anything other than to ask him. "Wow!" they said to each other "He must really love us! He must really think we're great to do something like this for us!" "Well after all," the other would reply "He did choose us out of everyone."
So they set out. They were going to finally have their very own farms and towns and they would get to choose how THEY wanted to get stuff done. No more of this staying in someone else's house thing. They were already planning on how they wanted to decorate their living rooms. Then about twenty minutes into the trip the road was closed. Since God was the instigator of this whole hoopla, it must have been his fault that this happened! "How could he have overlooked such an important detail?" one would say. "He obviously doesn't care as much for us as we thought he did! We'll just die here I guess." the other would reply. Well, God heard them talking so he cleared the road for them, then and there! With his own hand while they were all watching! They set out again immediately. "Wow! Did you see that?" one would say. "Yeah! God's own hand! I've never seen him do that for anyone else! We must be the greatest followers of all time!" the other would reply.
Well they walked and walked. God loved them and they really liked him, but he wanted them to learn how to love him more. Constantly he would put another road block in the way so he could show off his power to them and so they would say "Aren't you the greatest God there ever was?! I'm so glad you chose us!" but instead they would just get mad at him, thinking that yet again he had missed this detail. They even decided that he wasn't the greatest God after all (since he was such a flake with the travel arrangements). They built a giant golden iPhone with wifi so they could always keep tabs on the road conditions via google maps. That made God really upset because he and Steve Jobs didn't really see eye to eye on how to run the world. Plus, then he couldn't take credit for all the great stuff he did for them! They would just say "Oh this golden iPhone found a great desert shortcut." instead of thanking God. He was so pissed he threw the golden iPhone on the ground and the screen shattered. They tried ordering a new one, but the silver Blackberry wouldn't connect to the internet so far into the wilderness.
"I know what I'll do." God said one day "I'll make them a bunch of rules that are really hard to keep! Then they'll think 'well since he made them, we should ask him to teach us how to keep them.' and I'll get to hang out with them more!" He gave them the rules, but that just made them more annoyed at him. They were still mad about not being able to play Angry Birds anymore. "Just give them some time." God thought "They'll come around." He let them walk around for years, constantly doing them favors to show his love. Eventually their food ran out because they didn't plan for such a long walk. He had angels take them pots of beans and rice every morning. Think of it! Food from angels! But all they did was complain "If we still had our golden iPhone, we could look up recipes to make this better." one would say. "Yeah. I have type O blood, and I really need more protein than this." the other would reply.
On and on it went. God would show love, they would respond with how he could have done it better. They never could get it. Eventually they all did die. God couldn't let someone with an attitude like that into his promised land. They'd say "We made this all ourselves, despite all the times God messed it up." and then how was he to get more people to love him? Thankfully, some of the sons learned that trusting God was much more enjoyable than exerting independence and they got to go build their own houses. They decorated them differently than their parents had imagined though.